Archive for August, 2006

christian’s n’ Christmas

August 30th, 2006
Okay guys, I got this email and thought you would like to see it. Imagine what would happen if everyone done this!…LOL!

I know it is a little early, but put them on your Christmas list.

Have some fun and do something really worthwhile too!
Wanna have some fun this CHRISTMAS? Send the ACLU a CHRISTMAS CARD!
As they are working so very hard to get rid of the CHRISTMAS part of this holiday, we should all send them a nice, CHRISTIAN, card to brighten up their dark, sad, little world.
Make sure it says “Merry Christmas” on it.
Here’s the Address, just don’t be rude or crude.
ACLU
125 Broad Street
18th Floor New York, NY 10004
Two tons of Christmas cards would freeze their operations because they wouldn’t know if any were regular mail containing contributions.. So spend 39 cents and tell the ACLU to leave Christmas alone. Also tell them that there is no such thing as a Holiday Tree. . . . It’s a Christmas Tree even in the fields!!
And pass this on to your email lists. We really want to communicate with the ACLU! They really DESERVE us!!

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Are we ready?

August 28th, 2006

Is the United States ready for another national emergency?
I believe that tomorrow, August 29th, 2006, will have made one year since hurricane Katrina hit the coast.
As we look back and see New Orleans still in pieces, we wonder if President George W. Bush has done everything he can do.
Here is something to consider though…Bush has many things on his mind. I mean first of all look at all the people complaining about what a poor job that he has done while he is in office, that is enough to drive God insane….I mean if you have ever read the Bible, remember the children of Israel? Complaining about being in the desert and left to die…..they would have rather been back in Egypt….sometimes I wonder just what the American people DO want!
Anyway, back to Bush….okay, he has all the people complaining,he has the war with Iraq,war with Afghanistan,possible war with Iran (i think…who knows?),then all the Israel and Lebanon mess.
There is no way Miss Hillary Clinton will be able to hold up under all of this if she runs! Excuse me I forgot to add Rodham in there…LOL!
I’m sure by this time (thats if you are still reading) that you are wondering the whole point of this post…well it sorta started out about the hurricane thing but three other points that I guess I should go ahead and make while I’m at it are:
Are we ready for President Bush to go out of office?
Are we ready for a woman President?
Are we ready for HILLARY?

The simple answers for me are NO NO NO! Which I know that President Bush has to leave office but the latter two things do NOT have to happen and we need to pray that they don’t!!!!

That’s my ‘two cents.’

Vote in this poll for me and then leave some comments on this post regarding the questions that I have asked. I don’t care if you don’t agree with me, I would just like to know your views.

Here’s the poll:

Do you think that Princes guitar, projected on that sheet, really looks like a phallus?


View Results

Loading ... Loading ...
Also, check out this article on Yahoo News:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060828/ap_on_re_us/katrina_ap_poll_4

TNT,
 Jason

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THE REPUBLICAN FISHERMAN

August 22nd, 2006

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered
her
altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to
him,
“Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him
an
hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”
The man consulted his portable GPS
and replied, “You’re in a hot
air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a
ground elevation of 2346
feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97
minutes north
latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.
She
rolled her eyes and said, “You must be a Republican.”. “I
am,” replied the
man. “How did you know?” “Well,” answered the
balloonist, “everything you
told me is technically correct, but I have
no idea what to do with your
information, and I’m still lost.
Frankly, you’ve not been much help to
me.”
The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Democrat.”
“I am,”
replied the balloonist. “How did you know?”
“Well,” said the man, “you don’t
know where you are or where
you’re going. You’ve risen to where you are, due
to a large
quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no
idea
how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You’re
in exactly the
same position you were in before we met, but, somehow,
now it’s my
fault.”

Have a Good Day!

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Senior Humor part 3

August 21st, 2006

Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says… “Slim, I’m 83 years old now and I’m just full of aches and pains.  I know you’ re about my age. How do you feel? “Slim says, “I feel just like a new-born baby.” “Really?  Like a new-born baby?” “Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.

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Senior Humor part 2

August 20th, 2006

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of
years.  He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him
fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear
100%.  The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor
and the doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really
pleased that you can hear again.”  The gentleman replied, “Oh, I
haven’t told my family yet.  I just sit around and listen to the
conversations. I’ve changed my will three times!”

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WHY,WHY,WHY

August 19th, 2006

do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on “insufficient funds” when they know there is not
enough money?


Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn’t glue stick to the bottle?

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?


Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an “S” in the word “lisp”?

If people
evolved from apes, why are there still apes?


Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why
do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum
cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to
give the vacuum one more chance?


Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When
we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping
cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, “It’s all right?”
Well, it isn’t all right, so why don’t we say, “That hurt, you stupid
idiot?”


Why
is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that’s falling off
the table you always manage to knock something else over?


In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE……

The
statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is
suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best
friends — if they’re okay, then it’s you.

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Senior Humor part 1

August 18th, 2006

A very elderly gentleman, (mid nineties) very well dressed, hair well
groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel smelling slightly of a good
after shave, presenting a well looked after image, walks into an upscale
cocktail lounge.  Seated at the bar is an elderly looking lady, (mid
eighties).  The gentleman walks over, sits along side of her, orders a
drink, takes a sip, turns to her and says, “So tell me, do I come here
often?”

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CatBoy Continuation 2

August 18th, 2006

Catboy is sitting in a chair and he heard something and then there it was again and something was hiting the door and he went and looked out the peephole and seen Dogkid outside the door.
And Catboy said are you ready to lose again?
And Dogkid said bring it on.
And Catboy said please wait a minute and Dogkid said ok; POW; SHAKE; BANG!
Dogkid you lost again,said Catboy,Goodbye! POW SHAKE BANG!!!!!!!!!!

© Dave Fisher and CatBoy Productions 2006

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CatBoy Continuation 1

August 17th, 2006

Catboy is on the move again and Dogkid is his enemy and he said to me it should be a hoot.
And I do not think so and I was right and Catboy almost died but fought a hard match and I say HARD and won the victory over Dogkid.
And Dogkid will not bother Catboy again and if Dogkid had won we would have to fight him and win or die.

 © Dave Fisher and CatBoy Productions 2006

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CatBoy

August 17th, 2006

Catboy is a cat but it is a boy and he is a crime-fighter
He fights crime so much that he stays tired.
Well, that is all for this time, BYE.

 © Dave Fisher and CatBoy Productions 2006

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